Brave Enough to Let It Be Easy
There is success, there is significance, there is substance in ease, too.
I love the fresh start feeling of a new year, however arbitrary it may be. And historically, I’ve loved to go big at this milestone moment — to plan and plot every major change I’d make in my life for the months (and years) to come.
I still feel tempted to do that, but I feel something else too — the pull, or maybe just the permission, to let it be easy.
Perhaps it’s my North Node in Taurus; perhaps it’s because I’ve spent the last two weeks hardly doing a damn thing; perhaps it’s because when I sat down to write this essay, I felt the familiar impulse to stress over every word I write — but I’ve decided that my word for this year is “ease”.
Wherever I have a choice this year, I am choosing ease.
And I don’t mean choosing the easy way out; I don’t mean playing small or ignoring the changes I want to make or minimizing everything I hope to accomplish.
I mean allowing things to be easy that I have historically made hard — like how I reach the goals I set for myself; how I approach my work and relationships; even how I do the activities I love, like reading or connecting with friends — because I thought that made my “success” more substantial, made me more impressive, made any achievement that much more meaningful.
It’s almost as if I couldn’t (or wouldn’t) value any progress I made, anything I accomplished, any relationship I cultivated unless it required significant effort.
Of course there are hardships we can’t control or avoid, even if we’d love for life to be a bit easier.
Of course there are myriad ways society “rewards” us for working hard, even at the expense of our own health and happiness.
And, of course, there’s something to be said for the satisfaction of having made it through something that challenged you — of running a marathon or raising children or writing a book or continually healing from what has hurt you, whether emotionally, physically, or otherwise.
Of course there are nuances — of course!
But what I began to realize over the last year — and what I hope to really embody in this one — is that there is success, there is significance, there is substance in ease, too.
In creating work that feels important and impactful to myself and others in ways that feel effortless.
In focusing on the areas of my relationship that feel fun, connected, and nourishing instead of nitpicking anything that’s not.
In not stressing about every.single.word I write in these weekly essays, and simply sharing what’s on my heart whenever I’m ready to share it.
Ease, to me, is trusting that my life doesn’t have to be hard to be meaningful; to be my particular version of successful.
And so, as I think about this fresh start — about the intentions I have for 2022 and the goals I want to achieve — I’m also asking myself how I can incorporate more ease.
I’m well aware — we all are, I’m sure, especially after these last two years — that there are so many parts of this life that are difficult. There are so many things beyond our control; so many things we can’t choose.
Why would I make what I can choose that much harder?
This year, I choose to cultivate calm. I choose to protect my own peace.
I am choosing, as often and as earnestly as I can, to let it be easy.